Vinnie and Fash’s Manifesto of Art and Writing

By Michael Whelks

1. Put it in the mixer.
2. Start shit in the tunnel.
3. Two hundred per cent physical.
4. Bang your head against the changing room door or else you’re not hard.
5. Put it in the air; there’s nothing for us down here.
6. We aren’t using the pitch, we’re using the air.
7. Go straight across him so he knows you’re there.
8. Win it with your elbow.
9. Let people shake.
10. Hallelujah.
11. Let them shake.
12. Have that, have another one.
13. Put it in the mixer.
14. Feed the hype.
15. You want to come in the mixer?
16. Play direct; metaphors are for pussies.
17. What is too far?
18. There is no such thing as too far, Adam.
19. Let’s just hope common sense prevails, SHALL WE?

Michael Whelks has a cleft lip but no one talks about it.